Emotions color all our communication. ALL our thoughts and words have emotion underneath, alongside, carrying our truth and real message. It’s more often emotions, not words, that communicate context and meaning. Unresolved emotions generate 90% of conflict.
Even when words aren’t spoken, even when non-verbal communication isn’t evident, emotions are still very present and real. Consider this:
Our heart listens even if our mouth, ears and mind are closed.
Our heart feels even if our mind is over active.
Our heart connects, even if we try to be closed-off.
Our heart has an electromagnetic field that extends more than 3 feet — greater than a meter — around us.
Science has measured not only this heart field, but has proven that our emotions are transmitted and received through heart fields. Imagine that! It gives concrete meaning to “trust your heart.” Even though everyone can learn how to use their heart field tools to be aware of emotions, no one receives development at any stage of life to utilize this important human tool.
Something to Consider Personally
Utilizing Non Violent Communication language and process with clients always reinforces the need to address unresolved emotions. The simple and effective tools Marshall Rosenberg captured have always made a difference and become more powerful when matched with the neuroscience. When we own both our feelings and needs, choices become clearer. Our words become calmer. Others respond to us more consciously.
So, business sisters and brothers who believe that you can stuff down emotions, gloss them over (the author’s previous specialty) or compartmentalize feelings to deal with later, the BUZZER sounds loud! Foul! You just got the warning card.
We promise you this: you will keep dealing with and creating conflict. Unresolved emotions are following you around stirring up crap. You may not want to keep experiencing the repeat performance that gives you headaches, gut aches and heart aches. It’s time to face the emotions music. And yeah, you might just cry. But, you are going to feel better and achieve so much more. Guaranteed.
Something to Consider as a Leader
Everyone has trouble managing emotions at work. The same thing you should consider personally for freeing yourself of unresolved emotions is needed by everyone. Every team. Every organization.
Listening doesn’t happen because true listening requires an empathic and even empathetic connection between the people communicating. The most significant deterrent is depleting and conflicting emotions.
Employee engagement doesn’t happen because people unwilling to be vulnerable, passionate or connected won’t reveal their truth while emotions under the surface hold them back.
Workshops, coaching and establishing accountability for managing emotions at work are ground breaking. You can arm your people, arm your teams, to have a better understanding of emotions we all have as human beings. None of us got emotional intelligence education in school or university. None of us were issued an owner’s manual for managing emotions.
4 Elements to Managing Emotions at Work
Managing emotions at work is not only possible, it is essential to success. Nearly all conflicts have unresolved emotions at the heart of the problem. The four elements to managing emotions for people and organizations to put into practice are easy to learn. Time tested. Effective. Best practice. Apply to all aspects of life.
1. Emotions and Our Psychophysiology
- Learn the mechanisms by which emotions effect our mind and body
- Identify personal depleting and renewing emotions along with strategies to manage these emotions in multiple circumstances
- Identify scenarios where emotions in the workplace can both generate conflict and assist with productivity or communication
2. Emotional Opposites
- Learn the 36 most common depleting (negative) emotions in the workplace with their opposite 36 renewing (positive) emotions
- Practice the simple NOT technique to Name, Own and Tame negative emotions
3. Shifting Depleting Emotions for Individual and Group Improvement
- Learn how to increase heart-mind coherence which leads to greater awareness and more effective management of emotions
- Learn the 5 personal domains to shift from “emotions” to body, spirit, technical or mind.
- Learn and practice “Pause for Choice” techniques that enables improved listening, identifying of emotions, and problem-solving
- Practice individual and group coherence techniques that clear and shift depleting emotions in the workplace
4. Resolving Emotional Conflicts
- Learn and practice the 3 steps to resolving conflict generated from unresolved emotions – Practice physical and energetic listening skills that enables empathy for understanding
- Create personal plan that embraces the emotional spectrum we have as human beings
From Emotionally Strangled to Energized
VeraHeart’s passion is for guiding people to be whole — embracing the fullness of spirit, emotion, mind and body. It is that very wholeness that raises consciousness needed today. It is that wholeness that gives us access to our purpose and passion. It is the power we wield in that energy which creates superior performance and achievement beyond results anticipated. Emotions are a part of everything we do, are and want to be. Emotions are key to increasing our energy and living our purpose.
If you are dealing with repeating emotional distress and conflict, it is critical right now to build new resolution skills, habits and practices. You can’t avoid emotions in the workplace any more or relegate handing them to the Chief People Officer, HR Department or Employee Engagement Office. We are ready to help you free people to fully engage, unleash new energy and achieve more.
~ Coach Lane Michel